"There's not a man alive who can whup me. I'm too fast. I'm too smart. I'm too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked. "
-Muhammad Ali

This years playoffs have been among the wildest sports rides of my young life. Nearly every game has been a thriller and every series has been phenomenal. To misquote John Madden, when great players are playing great basketball and making great plays, well that's just great basketball. Predictions? Have you seen Nowitzki swatting balls away after the play is already whistled dead. He is almost KG like in his intensity. Tonight he finally goes off for a triple double and tears San Antonio a new one. Loof for Dallas to rise Phoenix-esque to prove that they can win even with a major player suspended. Diop has 5 blocks and Harris take over Terry's job with 30 points and 14 assists. Look for Duncan to foul out as he stumbles around trying to stop the Dallas guards from getting penetration. And in a moment of nearly divine irony, Manu Ginobli will break his coccyx on a flop as he tries to draw a foul.

The other series on tonight? How about this prophecy, from Bill Simmons latest mailbag on ESPN.com :

"I think LeBron comes through tonight.

I think he finishes off Detroit. I think the crowd in Cleveland gets behind him and carries him to another place. I think this will be one of those rare games when you know something momentous is happening as you're watching, even though it's not finished happening yet. I think LeBron seizes the moment, embraces it, crushes it, makes it his own.

LeBron is the league's new Boss.

I think tonight becomes his version of MJ's 63-point game in the Boston Garden, Springsteen's "Born to Run" album, Ali's KO over Liston, Pacino's scene in Louis' Restaurant, Tiger's minus-18 in Augusta. I think the Pistons walk off the court in a fog, wondering what the hell just happened. I think LeBron stands on the scorer's table, pounds his chest a few times, soaks in the cheers of the crowd, nods a few times for good measure. I think the delirious crowd remains for 20-25 minutes after the game, celebrating, hugging, high-fiving, celebrating some more. I think nothing in the NBA will be the same for another 12-15 years.

I think I will be watching. Actually, I know it."

Amen, Amen, and Amen.

"Sometimes, if they're really really sad, Good Dragons are capable of shedding a tear or two."
-Blackwolf the Dragonmaster

Links of the Day

• Snake Oil and Holy Water: good reading
• Dance Monkeyboy: Steve Ballmer at his kooky Microsoft best.
• Joshua Norton: Emperor of America and Protector of Mexico

Maybe I'll write something, someday.

"That's your plan? All you said was 'Whisper, Whisper, Whisper'."

I was checking my old Xanga counter, and it turns out that I am the twelveth listing on a Yahoo search for Gonads Kick and second on a Google search on Arrafat aids. Sweet.

"Some jokes are short and elegant, like a mathematical proof or a midget in a ballgown."
-Demetri Martin

I don't know if Vince can even read the following article now that he has been blocked by the corporate firewall, but I hope he does. It is an article written by 1979 Nobel Physics Prize winner, Dr. Steven Weinberg (currently a physics and astronomy proffesor here at the great University of Texas in Austin). I completely agree with his conclusions, including his view of religion and morality.

A Designer Universe

"I remixed a remix. It was back to normal. "
-Mitch Hedberg

I am mighty pissed off at the internet and my computer. After nearly 2 hours (I had a lot of catching up to do) of Vince-rebuttal, I got shunted to the Blue Screen. bollocks. Anyway, I'm going to summarize.

The Da Vinci Code: It's a freaking novel. A work of fiction. Dan Brown is an author of the same kind of pulp that Michael Crichton, Dean Kuntz, and Tom Clancy spew. But Catholics are making a big deal out of the negative portrayal of the Church and some supposed heresy about Jesus needing to get some every once in a while. The people whose faith will deteriorate because of DVC are the same people who believe that America's foreign policy should be governed by Clear and Present Danger or Sum of all Fears. And even if Jesus did marry Mary Magdeline and delegate the Church to her, so what? He is supposed to be fully Divine and fully human, right? The fact that he had sex shouldn’t be shocking. Other than Donut, how many 32 year old virgins can you reasonably expect me to believe in? Besides, the priests of Peter's Church aren't doing such a hot job of keeping their Spear's of Destiny in their vestments and out of their altar boys. (Yes that’s right, I just made a Priest-Penis/Spear-of-Destiny joke.) The notion of a Church headed by women probably won't do more harm to the Catholic reputation than Catholics are doing themselves.

West Campus: The article Vince references only tells half the story. While the developers originally expected to be able to charge through the roof, the sheer number of new units opening in the near future has reduced prices drastically. In my own apartment search, I've found that 4br/4ba unit in the Sterling building of the Quarters complex is going for just under $3000. While that seems expensive, the units all have hardwood floors, granite countertops, brand-new stainless steel brand-name appliances, and they all come with 41" plasma TV's. Plus pools, hot tubs, and all bills except electricity paid. Nothing in West Campus can offer those kinds of amenities. Also, those 4/4's have two bedrooms of 22'x14'. Those rooms are intended to be shared. Meaning that 6 people are splitting $2850 of rent. That is among the best deals anywhere in Austin. Factor in the proximity to downtown and UT and it gets even better. Yes, the 2x2's and 1 bedrooms are higher than most of the other properties in the area, but most of the other West Campus buildings are shit. And those places are still charging 650-750 for a smaller 1 bedroom unit. Now with these large new units with plasma tv's and hardwoods coming onto the market at 900, other places will have to start dropping rent to remain competitive.

Regarding parking, it will not be that big a deal. With the addition of the branch line of the light rail servicing West Campus, more UT shuttle buses, and the new "Lazy River," getting around WC should be easy. (The Lazy River is on the platform of a new student government group. It is commuting a la Schlitterbahn. The same group wants to melt down UT's Confederate Soldier copper statue and recast it as a huge Vince Young memorial.) I really like the idea of having a self-contained pedestrian community. It will mean almost everything you need will be a walk or bike ride away. Restaurants, entertainment, retail. It will be like Mockingbird Station in Dallas. Or the First Colony Town Centre in Houston. You should check that out, Vince. It’s off of 59 right before the mall in First Colony. Plus all the new commerce will be a good source of student jobs. I'm pretty stoked to see what West Campus looks like in a year and a half.

Anne Coulter vs Ariana Huffington: I think I made my opinion sufficiently clear in my comment. And what's this about you likeing sagging breasts Vince? Not even going to go there.

Whew. Let me post this before my laptop goes all Terry Schiavo on me again.

"Is it ridiculous? Or is it so ridiculous, it's the most ridiculously perfect idea that you never thought of?"

So I too have created a blog. Yes, I've joined a list of illustrious Chi Phi's who have taken to the blog-o-sphere. But I'm not here to chronicle all the banalities of my life. No, the only reason The Wookie Prophet exists is to serve as a counterpoint for Vince's theistic, right-wing philosobabbling on The Triumvirate of Bland. Now don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't like Vince; I think he's swell. We just butt heads on idealogical grounds. I know I'm not going to change his mode of thinking, but instead of rebutting each of his posts in the comments section, I've started this blog as an attempt to facilitate inter-blog fraternization and dialogue. Hopefully it will be taken in the spirit it is intended and not create any sort of violent schism between myself the Triumvarite.

While I reallly would like to answer Vince's Valentine's post, I would rather not start my blog off with such a inauspicious unseemly post denouncing Brother-Love and Christ. Instead, I have decided to give an alternate view to Vince's "Romantic-Love-as-a-Mirror-for-the-light-of-reflected-Caritas" theory:

"I love you so much that nothing else can matter to me-- not even you. Can you understand that? Only my love --not your answer. Not even your indifference. I havn't wanted much. I've never really wanted anything. Not in the total, undivided way, not with the kind of desire that becomes an ultimatum, 'yes' or 'no' and one can't accept the 'no' without ceasing to exist. That's what you are to me. But when one reaches that stage, it's not the object that matters, it's the desire. Not you, but I. The ability to desire like that. Nothing less is worth feeling or honoring."

Yes, I admit that I stole that from Ayn Rand. But if Vince can support his argument with quotes from an HIV positive, gay, staunch Roman Catholic; then I will quote any hypocritical author I please! Besides, that whole "Love as an elevation of self" gets me feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

Oh, and I promise to abstain from ad hominem attacks in future posts.